in the interest of more personal disclosure i am going to go at this one without thinking or editing a lot. and we’ll see, by the time i’m done, whether i can resist the urge to self-censor … and whether i actually post it.
first off, a close friend recently got a boyfriend and hasn’t called me in over a week. normally we talk 2 – 3 times a week. long, close talks. the kind of stuff you would tell a significant other if you had one, i am guessing. somehow, i am not mad, though. just jealous and a bit lonely. i am happy she found a guy to hang out with. lord knows i wish i had one.
still, the abandonment bums me out. i am used to it by now, but that still doesn’t make it easy. when you are the one who’s perpetually single, you are the one that everyone looks to for support in between relationships or when one is on the rocks. you are a good friend, you’ve got a good ear and you’re always around. they need you, they really need you. until everything gets mended up, or they meet someone new, or the partner is back from out of town, or the kids start crying … bye bye friends, hello quiet times. no one to share your big heart, patient ear, and wise counsel with … except your cat.
okay, i am sounding morose. and that was not my original intention. my original intention was to say how psyched i was to see what vile creatures my friends all are, sitting and stewing in their own juices and even manure sometimes. and as for online dating, i have not adequately chronicled my adventures in this odd, odd world, but that doesn’t mean i haven’t gone the distance. there have been many stories over the years. many! and over time i will recount them in these hallowed grounds. i just need to warm up to it.
in the meantime, i have been emailing one dude. he sounds fun and his picture looked okay. not exactly my style … i think he may be a bit of a jock. but he sounds interesting and moderately clever. he’s one of those “i’m only online because i’m new in town, trying to meet people” guys. sure you are. the rub: his name is rick. is it just me, or is there something inherently cheesy and/or untrustworthy about the name rick?
rick shroeder, rick springfied, rick astley, rick dees, rick james. i dunno man. that in combination with my jock suspicions — could be dicey.
enough said. posting now. i did it!