Sorry to keep ya’ll dangling on the outcome of the closed-door dating event I hyped last week. As it turns out, I had a fun experience. No love connections, no Col and soul mate sitting on a couch, holding hands and talking with Barbara Wawa in my future … but still fun.
3PM: I left work early to get a blow out and makeup done at one of my favorite places in the world − Blow Styling Salon. I am totes pals with the head stylist, David, and I adore the staff and the general environment. When I walked in I was scraggly, stressed out, anxious. Naturally my skin had broken out just in time for my big TV moment (Murphy’s Law). Well, they calmed me down and took care of everything. By the time I walked out I looked absolutely fabulous and was cool, calm and collected.
5PM: With one exception − I still didn’t know what I was wearing. I’ve been in wardrobe limbo of late. Am not fitting the clothes I wore the past two summers when I was marathon training and just generally in better shape. The invitation said to dress as you would on a first date. The last first date I had (a few weeks ago) I wore board shorts, a tank top & flip flops. Not an option. I swung by Darling for a last minute shock and awe shopping expedition and picked up a really cute purplish-pink dress, which I already had the perfect shoes and jewelry to complement. Score!
6:30 PM: As I approached the event location in Chelsea I saw all the other participants congregating outside. They held us out there like cattle for a bit while they continued to get set up inside. There were cameras everywhere − inside and outside. A quick scan of the dudes had me bummed. I saw lots of meek-seeming guys, dudes with long ponytails, and several fashion emergencies to boot. Can’t judge a book by its cover, indeed, but posture alone is quite telling. I generally think online dating attracts a type of man that I am not suited to date, and since this event drew participants from a pool of online dater profiles, I was not very hopeful. Met some cool gals while waiting in the line and we walked in together.
7:00 PM: They fed us copious amounts of alcohol and not very much food. Everyone received a little booklet with icebreaker exercises and 5 matches to guys who’d be there that night. I recognized one of the dudes on my cards as a gent I had actually communicated over email with many months back. We were supposed to get coffee or something like that and he just disappeared into the ether. I spotted him early on and he was cute from far away.
8:00 PM: Dr. Helen Fisher gave a talk. She was lovely. So smart talking about neuroscience …. a subject I, too, am interested in … and she looked terrific. By then I had had several drinks and was just roaming around talking with anyone and everyone. I approached the prior-communication dude and he had no recollection of our earlier exchange. He also acted like he didn’t know I was one of the 5 matches listed in his book. My esteem for him immediately plummeted. Too cool is not attractive. Neither is excessive gel and cologne, both of which he was rocking. I kept talking with him until some random guy walked up and tried one of the icebreaker things on me, giving me a great out.
8:30 PM: I continued to mingle, chatting with totally random dudes and dudettes. I am actually quite comfortable in that sort of setting, especially after 3 red wines. I ran into a very interesting guy … an Eco Pirate. He was one of the long hair ponytail guys. He goes on anti-poaching expeditions, is vegan, does that whole critical mass biking thing. Very interesting to talk with. Our bond was science, zen shit and general bemusement at the whole event. The aloof gel man of course came trolling back and tried to get back in the mix. He wanted to make fun of the Eco Pirate but was unsuccessful and I totes blew him off. I actually sort of enjoyed that − he was such a jerk.
9:00 PM: I approached Dr. Fisher, told her how cool she, how fascinating her work is … that I’d watched her TED talks on YouTube. I recommended that she read Biology of Transcendence by Joseph Chilton Pearce, and told her that she looked amazing in her little white dress. She was gracious and admitted that she had worked her ass off to fit into that dress and felt great wearing it.
9:30 PM: Tipsy and starving, I decided to make my exit and invited the Eco Pirate to get Mexican food with me nearby. On my way out the party organizers asked us to turn in our cards saying who we’d like to see again. I said no one, sorry. The lady said, “Not one?” The answer was no. There were many nice people but no one I had any chemistry with and that’s the whole point. Eco Pirate was a nice dude with interesting stories and adventures, but not a love connection. We had a nice dinner and I was home by 10:30.
11:00 PM: I texted David and several pals to tell them I had fun and looked hot but didn’t meet any dudes. David’s reply was: “You’ll find him. I’ll find him. We r all in the same boat. Keep your head up!”